Monday, April 27, 2009


God hit me up today.

I have a few friends who blog, some frequently, some not so frequently. Some of them probably don't even know that I read what they write. That's ok. I enjoy their insight, the knowledge God has blessed them with.

Today was rough. Today was a day when I would have liked to stay in bed and have someone else in my shoes. Nothing was particularly bad, I just had a hard time of it.

This afternoon as I didn't really have time to start another project, I thought I'd take a minute to read up on a couple blogs I hadn't checked in about a week. One had a great encouragement just waiting for me. I still feel a little bogged down and drained, but my perspective has begun to shift already (I read it only a few minutes before writing this). It is a good echo to what I had written earlier. God is my strength, and only when I have faith can I be strong because of Him.

Thanks, Adam, for letting God use you today.


Honestly? I have a bad attitude.
Honestly? I need to adjust it.

But, I'm stuck. I can't get out.

Honestly, I'm feeling lonely.
Honestly, I'm feeling like a failure.
Honestly, I'm feeling like I don't succeed at anything I try to do.

I know in my head that this line of thinking is bad, and is wrong, but for some reason Satan is trying to get in and ruin something; but I don't know what, and I don't know why.

I have so many things on my mind right now, and I just can't seem to get it all organized. I seem to be stuck in crazy world with no time to sort anything out. I'm just whirling around in circles trying to remember stuff and keep it going.

And honestly, I'm failing.

I keep praying but I feel like it's just hitting the ceiling. "Lord, can you hear me?"

Honestly, I know that I need to keep praying.
Honestly, I know that I need to keep trusting.
Honestly, I know that whatever this is, it will pass.
Honestly, I know that without His help, my faith will fail. With His help it will grow stronger.

Honestly, I know that God is in control and is the One Who is keeping me going right now.

Because on my own, I'd just be in a ball on the floor in the corner.

Honestly? I hope this ends soon.
Honestly? I know it may not.
Honestly? I know that whatever comes, He is with me. Really with me. Not just words.

I am weak. So weak.
He is Strong.

Friday, April 24, 2009

thank God for a good friend

yesterday did not start as a good day.

i had some stress that jumped in without warning. horrible.
i called a couple of my best friends (who were, of course, at work and unable to answer the phone) and my dad (same story). was there no one who could calm me down? let me vent and get it out so i could start to try to move past it?

when i finally got to my email at work, i saw an email from another best friend (one i hadn't tried to call). i called her immediately. despite being at work (the others, including my dad, had been in meetings - absolutely NO blame on them), she answered and was able to let me get out my emotions and ask for prayer. upon hanging up, i felt slightly better, but not as good as i would have hoped for such a beautiful, sunny, busy day.

i must say this is the part where the friend came to the rescue. this is a good friend. she admitted later that she spent some time after we hung up trying to think of a way to cheer me up. needless to say, she did come up with something. it involved a very good knowledge of the types of things that make me smile, and the knowledge of me to know that this was the time to pull it out. a magical email came my way and made me laugh out loud. i called her directly to let her know what a miracle she had just worked.

my attitude was immediately 1,000 times better, and remained so for the rest of the day.

she had class last night, and when she got home early, my response was, "wow, you're home early!" her answer was, "well, i'm giving you a massage now." :) nice. so, after the massage, and downing a rather large glass of water, i went to bed in a much MUCH better attitude than i had been all day.

today, i was able to start off well, and have the prospect of a very fun weekend.

thanks, friend. you started me back on the right road.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009


today i am stressed.

today i am tired.

today i have felt overwhelmed. more than once.

today my music has been distracting instead of helpful.

today i have tried to be positive.

today i have prayed. alot.

today i have asked questions.

today i have worried about others.

today i have asked for help.

today i have almost cried. almost.

today i have felt lost.

today i have tried to keep my focus on the Reason i am here.

today God has gotten me through.

tomorrow has possibilities. i hope they are bright.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Sun & Fresh Air...

I love sun. It makes me happy.

Not happy like I want to sit in it forever and get cancer, but happy as in, skies are blue, birds are singing, flowers are blooming, I can open my windows and let the fresh air in.

Maybe that's it. I love fresh air. IT makes me happy.

That's what is the best - even if it's raining, I love fresh air. Have you ever taken a walk in the rain? In a sprinkle? In a downpour? On purpose? So fresh. And very nice.

Today I left work for a break to run to the bank, and I had a very hard time getting in my car to drive there. Then, when I returned, going back into the building to go back to work was just as hard! But, I anticipated the end of the day and walking back out into that perfect fresh air and sunshine so much. Ah, perfect day. So wonderful! Definitely taking a walk when I get home.

I know this is contradictory as you are online to be able to read this, but I strongly encourage you to turn off your computer and go outside. Enjoy the fresh air. Whether it's raining or sunny where you are, it doesn't matter. Take a book, or take a walk, or a run, or whatever else you would like, and sit under a tree or under an awning if you have to, whatever, but get out there.

And the good news is, tomorrow in Chicagoland will be fabulous as well! 70 degrees, more sunshine. So if you're in that vicinity, there's really no excuses! ;)
Then, the next time it's raining, I challenge you to put on a sweatshirt and a raincoat and some good shoes, and go outside. It's a wonderous experience.

Oh, fresh air, how I love you.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

What do you say?

I don't know if anyone will respond to this, but after a day of relaxing, and wishing it had lasted much longer, I got to wondering this morning about what the ideal day would be.

It must be stated that the ideal day can come in many forms, even for me. Sometimes I want to be very active, outside, walking, swimming, biking, etc. Other days I just want to curl up under a blanket and read.

So, now it's your turn. While I ponder what would be the perfect combination for a 24 hour period, I'd like to hear what your perfect day would be. Join in the fun. Toss out some ideas.

Let's see what we come up with.

Saturday, April 11, 2009


can be Awesome.

God has shown me that through this past few weeks. I have been working strange and long hours, I have been so tired I don't know what's keeping me going, I have craved diet coke (which my friends do, but I do not, although I do enjoy it). These types of things should drive a person crazy, but instead, I have felt blessed. And I have seen many others blessed because of what is going on in my church.

This weekend consists of:
  • Good Friday services (2)
  • Easter ExploXion (Egg Hunt & more)
  • Easter Eve services (2)
  • Easter Morning services (3)
I don't have a ton of time to write (tons still going on), but I felt the need to just jot these things down.

God can use the crazy - if you let Him. He turns good attitudes in a crazy time into a wonderful witness. It encourages people you didn't even know needed encouragement. He lets you see the kids with huge smiles on their faces. He lets you hear their parents talking about what a great thing it is for their families.

We had 2 services for Good Friday, and God provided workers. He provided kids for how many crafts we had prepared so we weren't wasteful. He provided stands for banners in the nick of time this morning. He provided people to volunteer at all the stations that we needed this morning. He provided patience as people waited in lines for egg hunts, obstacle courses, cookie decorating, and petting zoos. He is providing people to blow up balloons, as well as to hand them out to the kids that come, both tonight and tomorrow morning. He is providing people to watch and teach children tonight and tomorrow.

I am excited to see what else He will do tonight and tomorrow as young and old are presented with the opportunity to walk through the door and accept Christ into their lives.

I know that the impact this weekend will be huge.
Thank you, Lord!!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009


Today I have the giggles.
I really do.
And, being April Fool's Day, you may be wondering: no, it was not due to any sort of prank.

When I woke up, I was in an ok mood, sorta tired,
but what else is new?
Got ready for the day, and headed out the door.
The sun is supposed to be shining, but it wasn't - at least not yet.

When I got in my car, I plugged in my ipod to listen to some tunes as I drove to work.

That's when it happened. The first song that came on (I'm currently in a random shuffle, thanks to genius) and I just started smiling. Huge smile, all random and alone in my car. I sang my heart out. I'm sure it was very pretty. (umm... maybe not.)

The next song brought a new smile to my face.
It was loud, it was crazy, it was great.
The third song followed suit. So did the next ones that followed.
Great stuff, music.

And, though I haven't listened to anything else yet today,
I'm still smiling.

And when you smile, it becomes contagious, and cheers others around you as well.

So, when you're feeling frustrated, or down, or don't really have words to describe it, here's my piece of insight for today (some of you may have heard it before):

Smile, it almost always helps.