It's been 3 months...

quite literally.

how did that happen?
well, i did say i'd be on hiatus...


i think often of things i'd like to write, but don't have the time. or it seems too mundane to write an entire post about. i assume most bloggers feel the same way, but somehow find a way around it. or are just better writers than i am. or maybe most of them just have more interesting lives...

in any case, we're less than 1 1/2 weeks from Christmas, and i'm giddy with thoughts of family, friends, babies, pedicures, cookies, delicious food of all kinds, and general happiness. oh, and time off work. i can't wait. my twin nephews are 3 1/2 months old, and they are adorable as ever (as is my niece) and i just wish i had (if not a time machine to be able to re-do periods of time and do EVERYTHING) at least a space machine that would allow me to travel the 2 hours in seconds so i could go visit more often. this would help with friendships as well.

maybe i should invent that.
yes. i'll get on it.

well, that's really all the time i can spare today - and it will probably be another (but hopefully not as) long span of time before i write again... if you have ideas of what i can write about/stories you'd like to hear, leave comments, let me know. :)

Until then - have a happy Christmas!

The Doctor & Captain Bluebear

I have been reading "The 13 1/2 Lives of Captain Bluebear" (which I discovered thanks to a recommendation by an Australian YouTuber and his list of favorite novels). There's a part in the middle of the story where the Bluebear has an affect on something that happened in his past by what he does in his present (the future). Suddenly, the author is explaining to the reader (directly) about how this is possible and why it can happen and that it doesn't make sense "but there it is".

I realized that it bothered me not because it was confusion, but because i couldn't understand a need for the explanation. Clearly I've watched a ton of Doctor Who; this type of thing is a common occurrence in several story lines, and among many characters. Particularly, I recall a recent episode (vague spoiler alert, skip to the next paragraph if you don't want to be spoiled or let down from vagueness) when the Doctor does something simply because he knows he did it since he saw the results in the past even though he's using the past experience to tell him what to do in his present (the future from the past) so he can still succeed in the same way in the past and get to the future where he can do those things to help himself (and others) in the past (and in the future). It's a bit of a crazy circle, huh?

But, I'm long past the confusion, it makes perfect sense now (yeah right, but I've given in - it's too confusing otherwise (and anyway) so you have to or quit watching, which just isn't an option). I love that crazy show. So much.

Unavoidable Hiatus

Unavoidable:
1. I have no working computer at home.
2. Posts I want to write are usually longer than the updates I can easily post on fb or twitter.
3. I so strongly desire to write most days, either here, or working on a story or poem or whatever, but it is hard to keep track of and keep it regular and/or fluent without a computer.

Thus,
1. I will be "hiatusing" until this is resolved.
2. I fully expect that from time to time (as it will take a bit to sort out a new computer) I will find a place to post, most likely shorter ones.
3. I am a little sad not to be sharing things more frequently, but appreciate your patience, and hope you'll return to read when I'm back -- and bring others with you!:)

p.s. if anyone wants to donate to the cause (funny stories, encouraging notes, commiserating comments, monetary gifts) feel free... check out my 'Talk' page. ;)

In Memoriam

Click here to read the whole poem. 

I know I will miss

the color of his sky blue eyes

the smell of his cologne

I remember

his skin, marked by the sun,

tanned, almost tough,

somehow, still soft.

I can feel his hugs

just tight enough

but perfectly gentle.

the ultimate embrace,

filled with love...

...I miss him.

always will.

what a month

i can't believe july is almost over.
so much has happened.

God is still good, and praise Him my faith is still strong.
prayers for many, and even myself.

more coming later...if i can get it together.

i am

i’m a giver without a receiver

a lover without a match

a helper without an outlet

i'm a mom without any kids

a wife without a husband

a housekeeper without a house

i am lost

------

i'm a sinner who is saved

a child who is found

a daughter of the King

i'm a weak one who’s been given strength

a poor one who’s been given hope

a lonely one, but in His embrace

i am found

------

my first thoughts are true

but ultimately less important

my God is bigger

------

i am saved

i am bought

i am owned

i am uniquely created

i am particularly chosen

i am specifically wanted

i am loved

Oi.

the stress.

it has arrived.

and i'm having trouble coping.

lucky for me, i got a few hugs yesterday, and that always helps.

but when i'm here, trying to think about too many too-difficult things at once, it rains down.

and i feel lost.


(sorry to dump today... maybe i'll be more upbeat later.)