Missing Pieces

I've been missing... sorry about that. Let me 'splain. No. There is too much. Let me sum up:

JAMAICA

Amazing. God made some very clear comments to my heart. Not as clear as I'd like, but clear none-the-less. I had an amazing time despite sweating every moment of every day - including while I slept, ate, worked, and even showered. We're talking dripping down my back as I ate my tiny breakfast at 8 in the morning. Met amazing people who inspire me to follow God's leading and watch what happens, worked with kids who were so excited to hang on us and be loved by us that everything we did/said/showed them was an instant hit, painted, was exhausted, and bonded with some of the coolest students on the planet. Don't know when my next adventure will be, but even now thinking back on my experience there with God, I can't wait to see how He uses me next.

SUMMER DAY CAMP

The reason I never blogged about Jamaica. I came home, I rested for A day. I did enough laundry to get through the week. I worked countless hours making sure we were prepared for Day Camp. This was my life for the next 3 weeks. Oh, and prepping for the fall ministry year. Yeah, cuz there isn't too much to do for that, is there? No. Of course not, silly.

VACATION AT THE LAKE
My saving grace this summer. It was the thing I looked forward to most after Jamaica. It was my time for rest, for recovery, for revitalization. I went with my mom and spent 9 & 1/2 days walking, reading, sitting in the sun, eating junk (spoiled Americans), taking pictures of God's glorious creation, talking with my grandparents, and relaxing (what a concept). It was wonderful.

A DAY WITH THE KIDDOS

I spent my first day back from Minnesota with my brother's family - my beautiful niece, my two adorable nephews, the best sister-in-law a girl could ever hope for, and (one of) my sweet brother(s). Pictures, tickling, laughing, hugging, Elmo-and-silly-song watching joyfulness.

FALL PREP AT WORK and beyond...

Yup. It came fast, it came crazy, it came expected and yet unexpectedly busy for some reason. I have now begun as a leader with our youth group, my small group (which I am also leader of) has switched gears, and I have helped my friend get some of our church's singles events going. It's been amazing, but I have not had a free weekend since ... August 18th. I have been out of town with friends, family, other youth leaders.

Today, in the midst of the last week of September (what??? where did the time go??) I realized I hadn't written here since JULY. (#epicfail) The summary now complete, I vow to be more regular again. Last year was a sad showing. This year has been positively pitiful. Let's make it look a little better before it leaves us, shall we?

Until next time...what have you been up to since July?

What God will do...

There's this strange sensation I get when, in life, I'm coming up to something out-of-the-ordinary. Its almost like I'm just an observer of the moments passing by. My body goes through the motions, I think through and do what must be done, but it often feels almost surreal.

For example, when going on vacation, my mind starts lists. Lists of work to be done before I'm gone for a week, lists of things to buy, lists of things to pack. Lists of things to wash, snacks to pick up, projects to complete. These lists don't stop growing as i do them either. Its usually about the day or two before leaving that I finally finish making lists; sometimes I have completed them by that time too, if I'm lucky.

But the whole count down is in this strange slow-fast motion type pace. It feels simultaneously as if it will never come, and as though there cannot possibly be enough time to get done all the things that need doing.

Then, suddenly, its the night before. Everything is packed, bought, prepared, thought through. I go through the motions: suitcase, backpack, water bottle, keys by the door. Oh, and shoes. And a sweatshirt, just in case. I get ready for bed, double-checking that everything at home is cleaned up, in its place. It takes what seems like forever, but I finally fall asleep.

In the morning, I do what needs doing. I get ready, I eat breakfast, drink some coffee. Pack the car. If I'm working before heading out, the day is always surreal as well. Tying up loose ends: those known and unknown. And then it happens. I'm off. I'm free.

I try to be mentally present wherever I am. I try to thoroughly enjoy my time - whether alone, or with friends or family. I create fond memories, escape into books, take walks, listen to music, take pictures, listen to music, admire God's amazing creation. If its not just vacation, i pour myself into the tasks at hand joyfully and always am blessed with the company, the work, and those served.

All too soon, I am heading home. Once there I sleep and do laundry and try to be ready for "normal" when it comes again the next day. Inevitably, about midway through the normal routine that week back, I realize that I feel almost like the adventure happened to someone else - like i just read about it, a character in a book, instead of my own experiences. I have memories, pictures, journal entries that prove otherwise, but it feels like a story.

I don't understand that.

This morning, I will be at my church at 4:15 am to leave with a youth missions trip (I'm a leader...) for Jamaica. We'll be there for 8 days. We have some ideas about what we may do there but have also been advised to expect "nothing but for God to work through us," and "organized chaos."

The only big thing I'm really nervous about is the people I'm going with that I don't know. There are 30 of us - and 4 leaders. I know the other 3 leaders. Now, of course, I've met most of the students. A few are very talkative and sweet, and all are very welcoming. I know in my head that it'll be great, and we'll all get to know each other. But I guess I find it a little odd that this is my biggest concern. Of course, I've been praying for all aspects of the trip: safety, travel, God to move, unity, etc., but none of those things are weighing on me. I know God is and will be faithful to us in these regards. And of course, I know He'll carry my little introverted and shy self through and bring me out with new and deepened friendships, but there you go. My own personal prayer request for the next 9 days.

In just a few hours, I'll be boarding the first plane of the day. I sort of hate very much taking off and landing - though I've never had a really bad experience. By the end of the day, I'll be in a country I've never been in before, starting a new experience in my service to God.

I am nervous about a few things, but mostly (and most importantly), I am excited. I know God has brought me to this and made it all possible for me to go. All praise and glory to Him.

I can't wait to see what He does.