Crumble

What do you do when everything crumbles around you?

I have a tendency to crumble with it. Not right away, not quickly, but I do indeed crumble. There have been a few times that things were built back up fast enough that I did not fall before it was resurrected. Usually, though, even if it's briefly, I crack. I find myself in a real struggle mentally, emotionally, and even spiritually - though I don't always recognize that part of it.

So what do you do? How do you keep going and not just sit at home moping or crying or hiding from everything and everyone? Well, for me, it's often found in music. Which then leads me to Scripture, which is the spoken Word from God to me. (!) And of course, the best place to go is God - so even though I pray a lot through whatever circumstance I find myself in, the

music --> Scripture --> God's heart 

is the path that takes me outside my own head and realigns me with the One who can not only sort it out, but make it worth it.

Today, the song thankfully stuck in my head is Everything Falls by Fee. Specifically repeating:

You said You'd never leave or forsake me
When you said, this life is gonna shake me
...
There will be storms in this life
But I know You will overcome, you have overcome
...
When everything falls apart Your arms hold me together
When everything falls apart You're the only hope for this heart
When everything falls apart and my strength is gone
I find You mighty and strong, You keep holding on

God is, indeed, good.  And the best place to begin rebuilding is worship.

Going into Monday...

As I prepare to head to bed, I thought I'd better get these -ahem- thoughts down before I forgot. Because I think I'll need to remember them a few times this week.

I serve a great and mighty God, Who has gone above and beyond anything I can even imagine - I can't even come close to actually comprehending what He's done for me - and how much He loves me. He has given me gifts (relationships with people, helping others, singing, playing the piano, listening, praying, I could sit and think of more, but let's move on) that I can use better than someone who hasn't got those gifts from Him. My responsibility is to do the very best that I can in this world, in the situations that present themselves on a weekly, daily, hourly (minutely?) basis. As long as that is my goal (glorifying Him by using the gifts He's graciously given me), there is no such thing as failure. No matter what does or does not get accomplished in this place, in the world, in my life, my job, my relationships with others, if (IF) I am truly doing my best FOR HIM, I cannot fail. He won't let me fall and smudge His Name. I do not (absolutely do not, no chance, no question about it) have enough strength or force of will to do that day in day out - sometimes even hour or minute in or out - but He does.

Therein lies my confidence. My ability to persevere. My ability to continually pray to the One Who is my Rock, my Strength, my Guide, my Protector, my Savior, my Peace. Because of these things (promises He's made to me - not that it'll be easy, but that He will never leave my side), I can be content in Him. It doesn't mean I have to like the situation(s), but I have to trust Him, have confidence in Him. And because I know that He's the One in charge, I can be truly fearless in the fact that I am His, He is mine (!), and He knows what's gonna happen even when I don't (which is almost always). Peace that transcends understanding. Contentment.

Glory to God, forever.

Everything Falls (lyrics post)

these are words from a song that has touched me today.
i'm not really feeling like everything is falling apart, but i am feeling some stress and need to think through a few big decisions (nothing crazy, don't get crazy worried).

But, as i believe God brought them to me for a reason, maybe He wants you to see them too.

partial lyrics, Everything Falls, by Fee
you said, you'd never leave or forsake me
when you said, this life is gonna shake me
you said, this world is gonna bring trouble on my soul
this i know

when everything falls apart, your arms hold me together
when everything falls apart, your the only hope for this heart
when everything falls apart, and my strength is gone
i find you mighty and strong
you keep holding on
you keep holding on

i still believe
your faithful arms will never let me go
and still i know

when everything falls apart
and my strength is gone
i find you mighty and strong

there will be storms in this life
but i know you will overcome
but i know you will overcome

when everything falls apart
your arms hold me together
when everything falls apart
your the only hope for this heart
you keep holding on

make me more like you, Jesus.